St George's Day
Holiday please for our national day!
Thursday, 28 April 2011
Catching Up - St George's Day
It is the church festival of St. George, regarded as England’s national day (although not an official bank holiday). On this day some patriotic English people wear a rose pinned to their jackets.
St George's Day
St George's Day
Catching Up - Easter
Eggs!!
Easter
Easter
Nothing much more to say about Easter, except eggs, eggs, eggs, which I didn't buy this year. Yay!
Catching Up - Earth Day
Earth Day
Earth Day is a day that is intended to inspire awareness and appreciation for the Earth's natural environment.
Earth Day was founded by United States Senator Gaylord Nelson as an environmental teach-in first held on April 22, 1970.
While this first Earth Day was focused on the United States, an organization launched by Denis Hayes, who was the original national coordinator in 1970, took it international in 1990 and organized events in 141 nations.
Earth Day is now coordinated globally by the Earth Day Network, and is celebrated in more than 175 countries every year. Numerous communities celebrate Earth Week, an entire week of activities focused on environmental issues. In 2009, the United Nations designated April 22 International Mother Earth Day.
Earth Day
Nearly there, nearly caught up!!
Earth Day is a day that is intended to inspire awareness and appreciation for the Earth's natural environment.
Earth Day was founded by United States Senator Gaylord Nelson as an environmental teach-in first held on April 22, 1970.
While this first Earth Day was focused on the United States, an organization launched by Denis Hayes, who was the original national coordinator in 1970, took it international in 1990 and organized events in 141 nations.
Earth Day is now coordinated globally by the Earth Day Network, and is celebrated in more than 175 countries every year. Numerous communities celebrate Earth Week, an entire week of activities focused on environmental issues. In 2009, the United Nations designated April 22 International Mother Earth Day.
Earth Day
Nearly there, nearly caught up!!
Catching Up - April Fools Day
April Fool's Day
A day of jokes and tricks. You have to play the joke before 12 o’clock midday, otherwise the joke is on you.
April Fools Day
A day of jokes and tricks. You have to play the joke before 12 o’clock midday, otherwise the joke is on you.
April Fools Day
I didn't have any trickes played on me, thankfully, but this news story that went 'viral' maybe could be called an April Fools of sorts.
More details as they come in:-)
Catching Up - British Summer Time Begins
British Summer Time Begins (daylight savings = clocks go forward 1 hour)
I've just about got used to this now, and looking forward to times when my grandchildren come over now the garden is set up for sandpits and playtimes.
British Summer Time
I've just about got used to this now, and looking forward to times when my grandchildren come over now the garden is set up for sandpits and playtimes.
British Summer Time
I like to think my blog is helping people who lose days or hours or weeks, like I sometimes do, they can look here and know what's been happening and speak to people in a clued up way like they knew all along!
Catching Up - Spring Begins
Spring begins
'Vernal (or spring) equinox' and happens around 21 March.
Around March 20 or 21, the sun shines directly on the equator and the length of day and night are nearly equal in all parts of the world.
Spring
'Vernal (or spring) equinox' and happens around 21 March.
Around March 20 or 21, the sun shines directly on the equator and the length of day and night are nearly equal in all parts of the world.
Spring
Ahh, really beautiful, hello spring and welcome!
Catching Up - St Patricks Day
I'm supposed to be studying, and I have been, but having a little break and seeing how far behind I am with this blog.
We've had some good days during March and I will celebrate them even though they've gone.
First on 17th March we had St Patricks day. Happy days for all your drinkers, you tarts:-)
St Patrick's Day
There you go, all sparkly and shiny!
We've had some good days during March and I will celebrate them even though they've gone.
First on 17th March we had St Patricks day. Happy days for all your drinkers, you tarts:-)
St Patrick's Day
There you go, all sparkly and shiny!
Friday, 18 March 2011
Illustration from Mudd Lavoie
“Some people never go crazy.
What truly horrible lives they must live.”
— Charles Bukowski
“Some people never go crazy.
What truly horrible lives they must live.”
— Charles Bukowski
Live 'with' the Earth!
"This is the hardest time to live, but it is also the greatest honor to be alive now, and to be allowed to see this time. There is no other time like now. We should be thankful, for creation did not make weak spirits to live during this time. The old ones say 'this is the time when the strongest spirits will live through and those who are empty shells, those who have lost the connection will not survive.' We have become masters of survival -we will survive- it is our prophecy to do so."
"Humanity must shift from living "on" the earth, to living with her."
- Tiokasin Ghosthorse
"Humanity must shift from living "on" the earth, to living with her."
- Tiokasin Ghosthorse
Monday, 14 March 2011
Thursday, 24 February 2011
Morning Routine
My morning routine is pretty .. err routine, yes it is.
I read somewhere, can't remember where, that morning routines are pretty useful. I'm not sure if they are or not, but here is mine.
After waking, I use a Dlux vitamin D spray.
This was recommended by our health food shop, it certainly does feel fresh and gives your waking moments a zing. I then check emails and Internets, because, of course, I'm very important and have to keep in touch with world developments, well, at least the latest celeb updates on the trashy Daily Fail.
I like to have a banana then as it's more or less the only fruit I like, followed by my children's chewable multi vitamins, because I can't swallow tablets! They're not 'my' children's vitamins, you understand, I wouldn't take their vitamins from their mouths, they are general children's vitamins, sold at Tesco and all other money grabbing establishments. Now I'm all confused with the apostrophe's, damn the English language!
This is all washed down with a nice fresh glass of water.
I'd like to add to that with a bit of exercise that I've neglected since Christmas, so from now on I'm going to try to add in my time on the treadmill to my morning routine.
Watch this space.
I read somewhere, can't remember where, that morning routines are pretty useful. I'm not sure if they are or not, but here is mine.
After waking, I use a Dlux vitamin D spray.
This was recommended by our health food shop, it certainly does feel fresh and gives your waking moments a zing. I then check emails and Internets, because, of course, I'm very important and have to keep in touch with world developments, well, at least the latest celeb updates on the trashy Daily Fail.
I like to have a banana then as it's more or less the only fruit I like, followed by my children's chewable multi vitamins, because I can't swallow tablets! They're not 'my' children's vitamins, you understand, I wouldn't take their vitamins from their mouths, they are general children's vitamins, sold at Tesco and all other money grabbing establishments. Now I'm all confused with the apostrophe's, damn the English language!
This is all washed down with a nice fresh glass of water.
I'd like to add to that with a bit of exercise that I've neglected since Christmas, so from now on I'm going to try to add in my time on the treadmill to my morning routine.
Watch this space.
Saturday, 19 February 2011
Possibilities?
50 ways to open up your world from Tiny Buddha!
As one of the comments says, try one a week and see what opens up in your world.
As one of the comments says, try one a week and see what opens up in your world.
Just FEEL!!
Full version at Tiny Buddha
If you have a high EIQ, you likely regulate your emotions well; handle uncertainties and difficulties without excessive panic, stress, and fear; and avoid overreacting to situations before knowing the full details.
Some Steps to Improve Your Emotional Intelligence:
1. Understand what emotional intelligence looks like.
Psychologist Daniel Goleman identified five elements to EI:
Self awareness, self regulation, motivation, empathy, and social skills.
This means you understand what’s going on in your head and heart; you don’t make hasty decisions on impulse; you can motivate yourself to delay gratification; you listen to, understand, and relate to other people well; and you’re able to focus on other people.
2. Use meditation to regulate emotions.
3. Take an honest look at your reactions.
Do you frequently jump to conclusions without knowing all the facts?
Do you need other people’s approval to feel comfortable in your own skin?
Do you assume you know what other people feel and take responsibility for that?
Do you freak out over stressful situations, blaming other people, getting hard on yourself, and panicking over possible consequences?
4. Practice observing your feelings and taking responsibility for them.
It’s not always easy to understand a feeling when it happens, especially if you think you shouldn’t feel it; but forget about should. Instead, try to pinpoint exactly what you feel—scared, frustrated, worried, ashamed, agitated, angry—and then pinpoint what might be the cause. Reserve all judgment.
Simply find the cause and effect, i.e.: your employer seemed unhappy with your work, so now you feel stressed, or your significant other expressed dissatisfaction, so now you feel scared. Anytime you feel something uncomfortable that you’d rather avoid, put a magnifying glass on it.
Once you know what you feel, you can now challenge both the cause and the effect.
Learn to Sit with Negative Feelings
Even if you reframe a situation to see things differently, there will be times when you still feel something that seems negative. While not every situation requires panic, sometimes our feelings are appropriate for the events going on in our lives.
We are allowed to feel whatever we need to feel. If we lose someone, we’re allowed to hurt. If we hurt someone, we’re allowed to feel guilty. If we make a mistake, we’re allowed to feel regretful. Positive thinking can be a powerful tool for happiness, but it’s more detrimental than helpful if we use it to avoid dealing with life.
Pain is part of life, and we can’t avoid it by resisting it. We can only minimize it by accepting it and dealing with it well.
That means feeling the pain and knowing it will pass.
No feeling lasts forever. It means sitting in the discomfort and waiting before acting. There will come a time when you feel healed and empowered.
Our power comes from realizing we don’t need to act on pain; and if we need to diffuse it, we can channel it into something healthy and productive, like writing, painting, or doing something physical.
Create Situations for Positive Feelings
This is the last part of the puzzle. As I mentioned before, we tend to be more reactive than active, but that’s a decision to let the outside world dictate how we feel.
We don’t need to sit around waiting for other people to evoke our feelings. Instead, we can take responsibility to create our own inner world.
We can identify what we want to say yes to in life and choose that before struggling with whether or not to say not to someone else. If you love dancing, take a class.
If your greatest passion is writing, [just write]. If you daydream about being a musician, start recording.
Don’t worry about where it’s leading. Do it just because you love it.
We need to do the things we love—or as Sonya Derian phrased it: make feeling good our new religion.
Negative feelings are only negative if they’re excessive and enduring. We won’t hurt ourselves into eternal misery if we let ourselves feel what we need to.
Still, we don’t have to feel bad nearly as often as we think.
If you have a high EIQ, you likely regulate your emotions well; handle uncertainties and difficulties without excessive panic, stress, and fear; and avoid overreacting to situations before knowing the full details.
Some Steps to Improve Your Emotional Intelligence:
1. Understand what emotional intelligence looks like.
Psychologist Daniel Goleman identified five elements to EI:
Self awareness, self regulation, motivation, empathy, and social skills.
This means you understand what’s going on in your head and heart; you don’t make hasty decisions on impulse; you can motivate yourself to delay gratification; you listen to, understand, and relate to other people well; and you’re able to focus on other people.
2. Use meditation to regulate emotions.
3. Take an honest look at your reactions.
Do you frequently jump to conclusions without knowing all the facts?
Do you need other people’s approval to feel comfortable in your own skin?
Do you assume you know what other people feel and take responsibility for that?
Do you freak out over stressful situations, blaming other people, getting hard on yourself, and panicking over possible consequences?
4. Practice observing your feelings and taking responsibility for them.
It’s not always easy to understand a feeling when it happens, especially if you think you shouldn’t feel it; but forget about should. Instead, try to pinpoint exactly what you feel—scared, frustrated, worried, ashamed, agitated, angry—and then pinpoint what might be the cause. Reserve all judgment.
Simply find the cause and effect, i.e.: your employer seemed unhappy with your work, so now you feel stressed, or your significant other expressed dissatisfaction, so now you feel scared. Anytime you feel something uncomfortable that you’d rather avoid, put a magnifying glass on it.
Once you know what you feel, you can now challenge both the cause and the effect.
Learn to Sit with Negative Feelings
Even if you reframe a situation to see things differently, there will be times when you still feel something that seems negative. While not every situation requires panic, sometimes our feelings are appropriate for the events going on in our lives.
We are allowed to feel whatever we need to feel. If we lose someone, we’re allowed to hurt. If we hurt someone, we’re allowed to feel guilty. If we make a mistake, we’re allowed to feel regretful. Positive thinking can be a powerful tool for happiness, but it’s more detrimental than helpful if we use it to avoid dealing with life.
Pain is part of life, and we can’t avoid it by resisting it. We can only minimize it by accepting it and dealing with it well.
That means feeling the pain and knowing it will pass.
No feeling lasts forever. It means sitting in the discomfort and waiting before acting. There will come a time when you feel healed and empowered.
Our power comes from realizing we don’t need to act on pain; and if we need to diffuse it, we can channel it into something healthy and productive, like writing, painting, or doing something physical.
Create Situations for Positive Feelings
This is the last part of the puzzle. As I mentioned before, we tend to be more reactive than active, but that’s a decision to let the outside world dictate how we feel.
We don’t need to sit around waiting for other people to evoke our feelings. Instead, we can take responsibility to create our own inner world.
We can identify what we want to say yes to in life and choose that before struggling with whether or not to say not to someone else. If you love dancing, take a class.
If your greatest passion is writing, [just write]. If you daydream about being a musician, start recording.
Don’t worry about where it’s leading. Do it just because you love it.
We need to do the things we love—or as Sonya Derian phrased it: make feeling good our new religion.
Negative feelings are only negative if they’re excessive and enduring. We won’t hurt ourselves into eternal misery if we let ourselves feel what we need to.
Still, we don’t have to feel bad nearly as often as we think.
Thursday, 17 February 2011
Feel the Fear and Act Anyway!
Change means reinvention. Each time a major shift happens in our lives—leaving a job or a relationship, moving, losing a loved one—we have to take control of who we will become or risk never reaching our full potential.
When I’ve waited for my future to find me, I’ve waited in vain, lost in confusion and sadness, or I’ve gotten tangled up in a situation I didn’t want.
One morning, after struggling for months with grief and loss, I woke up and realized that I was having so much trouble moving forward partly because I had no idea what it was that I wanted to move towards.
I was thinking about my past, but not what I wanted for my future.
Create a vision for your future.
Imagine how it will feel to be in that new place. Picture the sun coming up behind your future, the warm glow of the light on your face.
Write about your reinvention.
Imagine a scene from it, or write about how you’d like it to play out. Where are you living? What do you do in the mornings, afternoon, evenings? Who are your friends? What do you spend your days doing?
Now that you have a vision of your future, break it up into workable tasks
Every day, go back to that vision of you walking towards your future.
Ask yourself this: “What can I do in this moment to keep moving forward?”
Then, no matter what you feel in the moment—lonely, self-critical, tired, lazy, or disappointed—do something to maintain momentum, even if it’s one small thing.
There’s an old adage that says that true courage isn’t about not feeling fear; it’s about feeling fear and acting anyway.
Choose courage instead of letting your fear choose your future for you.
Read more of this on Tinybuddha
When I’ve waited for my future to find me, I’ve waited in vain, lost in confusion and sadness, or I’ve gotten tangled up in a situation I didn’t want.
One morning, after struggling for months with grief and loss, I woke up and realized that I was having so much trouble moving forward partly because I had no idea what it was that I wanted to move towards.
I was thinking about my past, but not what I wanted for my future.
Create a vision for your future.
Imagine how it will feel to be in that new place. Picture the sun coming up behind your future, the warm glow of the light on your face.
Write about your reinvention.
Imagine a scene from it, or write about how you’d like it to play out. Where are you living? What do you do in the mornings, afternoon, evenings? Who are your friends? What do you spend your days doing?
Now that you have a vision of your future, break it up into workable tasks
Every day, go back to that vision of you walking towards your future.
Ask yourself this: “What can I do in this moment to keep moving forward?”
Then, no matter what you feel in the moment—lonely, self-critical, tired, lazy, or disappointed—do something to maintain momentum, even if it’s one small thing.
There’s an old adage that says that true courage isn’t about not feeling fear; it’s about feeling fear and acting anyway.
Choose courage instead of letting your fear choose your future for you.
Read more of this on Tinybuddha
Wednesday, 16 February 2011
Que Sera Sera
“Believe nothing no matter where you read it, or who said it, no matter if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and common sense.” ~Buddha
Sometimes it seems to me that we are collectively obsessed with expert advice.
But when it comes to the decisions we need to make for ourselves, the experts can easily become a crutch.
But no expert can provide that answer. Sometimes there isn’t an answer, and there won’t be until we act and then learn the consequences of our choices.
It happens all the time in the modern world.
You see a self-help book from a best-selling author and assume it’s a ground-breaking resource before even reading it. Or you see an eBook priced at $97 and assume it must be a valuable tool. Or someone offers you something for free and, in the end, you devalue it—if it costs nothing, it doesn’t appear to be worth something.
The value we attribute to people and things isn’t always an accurate reflection of the value they can offer us—particularly when we’re looking for answers to avoid the pain of acknowledging there aren’t any.
At the end of the day, we need to know when we know all we can, and then we need to act and own that choice.
All the good advice in the world won’t change that the future is unpredictable, and even counsel from an expert with a wall full of degrees can’t guarantee a specific outcome.
The experts don’t have all the answers. Sometimes there aren’t any absolute answers. More often than not the real answer is that we have to use our own instincts and common sense and accept that what will be, will be.
From Tiny Buddha
Sometimes it seems to me that we are collectively obsessed with expert advice.
But when it comes to the decisions we need to make for ourselves, the experts can easily become a crutch.
But no expert can provide that answer. Sometimes there isn’t an answer, and there won’t be until we act and then learn the consequences of our choices.
It happens all the time in the modern world.
You see a self-help book from a best-selling author and assume it’s a ground-breaking resource before even reading it. Or you see an eBook priced at $97 and assume it must be a valuable tool. Or someone offers you something for free and, in the end, you devalue it—if it costs nothing, it doesn’t appear to be worth something.
The value we attribute to people and things isn’t always an accurate reflection of the value they can offer us—particularly when we’re looking for answers to avoid the pain of acknowledging there aren’t any.
At the end of the day, we need to know when we know all we can, and then we need to act and own that choice.
All the good advice in the world won’t change that the future is unpredictable, and even counsel from an expert with a wall full of degrees can’t guarantee a specific outcome.
The experts don’t have all the answers. Sometimes there aren’t any absolute answers. More often than not the real answer is that we have to use our own instincts and common sense and accept that what will be, will be.
From Tiny Buddha
Sunday, 13 February 2011
Sunday, 6 February 2011
It's Not Who I Am
Just read this on Tiny Buddha, logically I believe the first sentence highlighted in yellow to be true, and it's the best way I've seen it written or heard it said. It wasn't who I was, it was what I did! Still, I feel the pain for the loved ones I hurt, but those simple words actually say such a lot to me. Thank you Tiny Buddha!
"Do not punish yourself for past actions. Your past behavior was what you’ve done, but it is not who you are.
Who you are is still unfolding. Mistakes, errors in judgments, and failures all add to our character and value. They make us human and compassionate and wise. To berate yourself for acquiring these valuable qualities is wrong, so stop it. A new beginning starts today".
I'm not saying I will ever stop feeling guilty, because that's unrealistic, but I do believe it's not who I am to have caused all that hurt, it was something I did when in the grips of my addiction to alcohol.
I'm ashamed of what I did, I feel so much guilt and hate for what I did, but it wasn't and isn't who I am.
I wanted so much better for my children than I had, I wanted their lives to be perfect, to feel loved, to grow up feeling secure and everything every parent wants for their children. I wanted that for them, but all I can do now is try to improve each day, be here for them now. However much I would give to go back and do it all again right, I can't, so all I can do is try the best I can now.
What I can say is, I don't know how they did it, but I'm super proud to say they all turned out to be fine, loving, and giving people, they are truly awesome as they tread their own path through life. Love you my family xxx
"Do not punish yourself for past actions. Your past behavior was what you’ve done, but it is not who you are.
Who you are is still unfolding. Mistakes, errors in judgments, and failures all add to our character and value. They make us human and compassionate and wise. To berate yourself for acquiring these valuable qualities is wrong, so stop it. A new beginning starts today".
I'm not saying I will ever stop feeling guilty, because that's unrealistic, but I do believe it's not who I am to have caused all that hurt, it was something I did when in the grips of my addiction to alcohol.
I'm ashamed of what I did, I feel so much guilt and hate for what I did, but it wasn't and isn't who I am.
I wanted so much better for my children than I had, I wanted their lives to be perfect, to feel loved, to grow up feeling secure and everything every parent wants for their children. I wanted that for them, but all I can do now is try to improve each day, be here for them now. However much I would give to go back and do it all again right, I can't, so all I can do is try the best I can now.
What I can say is, I don't know how they did it, but I'm super proud to say they all turned out to be fine, loving, and giving people, they are truly awesome as they tread their own path through life. Love you my family xxx
You're Perfect Just As You Are!
From Tiny Buddha
There’s nothing wrong with me.
And there’s nothing wrong with you.
Here’s how I know both of these statements are true:
You’re playing the game of life as best you know how, and trying to get better every day. You can’t possibly do someone else’s best, so there’s no point in stressing about it.
You make mistakes like everyone else, which allows you to learn as you go. That means you’re doing what you should be.
You’re unique, whether you’re introverted or outgoing, book smart or street smart, creative or technical—the list goes on and on. You’re the world’s only opportunity to know a person just like you. The only hope to share what only you can.
There’s no such thing as the way you should be. If you do what you enjoy and don’t harm other people, you’re living a beautiful life.
You will never become someone—you are someone right now, whether you influence millions of people or mean the world to just one person. Your impact is powerful, whether you realize it or not.
If someone hurts you, you don’t deserve it. No one does. End of conversation.
You feel emotions and respond to them. That’s the way this whole humanity things works. If you could stand to improve the way you respond, newsflash: you’re still like everybody else.
You have a pulse right now, and it’s your choice what you do with it. There’s no right or wrong answer. (Unless what you want is to maim a puppy or something equally perverse.)
You choose what you think is best, or else you wouldn’t choose it. As you get new information and grow stronger and smarter, you’ll make different choices.
You are beautiful, inside and out.
There’s nothing wrong with me.
And there’s nothing wrong with you.
Here’s how I know both of these statements are true:
You’re playing the game of life as best you know how, and trying to get better every day. You can’t possibly do someone else’s best, so there’s no point in stressing about it.
You make mistakes like everyone else, which allows you to learn as you go. That means you’re doing what you should be.
You’re unique, whether you’re introverted or outgoing, book smart or street smart, creative or technical—the list goes on and on. You’re the world’s only opportunity to know a person just like you. The only hope to share what only you can.
There’s no such thing as the way you should be. If you do what you enjoy and don’t harm other people, you’re living a beautiful life.
You will never become someone—you are someone right now, whether you influence millions of people or mean the world to just one person. Your impact is powerful, whether you realize it or not.
If someone hurts you, you don’t deserve it. No one does. End of conversation.
You feel emotions and respond to them. That’s the way this whole humanity things works. If you could stand to improve the way you respond, newsflash: you’re still like everybody else.
You have a pulse right now, and it’s your choice what you do with it. There’s no right or wrong answer. (Unless what you want is to maim a puppy or something equally perverse.)
You choose what you think is best, or else you wouldn’t choose it. As you get new information and grow stronger and smarter, you’ll make different choices.
You are beautiful, inside and out.
I Can Choose.
From Tiny Buddha.
I thought I was okay with it, but I was damaged.
I realized somewhere in my late 20s that it affected me. I felt an intense emptiness inside. I’d become sad at times for no reason. I’d feel like crying but couldn’t.
I tended to lean towards the negative. The future always seemed uncertain and scary.
It influenced relationships in ways I didn’t realize until recently.
It impacted my ability to express emotions because I’d decided that being strong meant holding them in. I wouldn’t have been able to write this a year ago.
I managed to make it to the age of 29 without having my heart broken; in fact, I was only 5 months away from 30 when it happened. It was a traumatic experience for me, probably because it was the first time.
The abandonment aspect was hardest part. I was depressed. I felt certain that something was wrong with me. I blamed myself. I hated myself. My confidence and trust were shaken. I felt abandoned. I thought I would never recover. I felt damaged yet again.
Some time later I reconnected with someone I dated briefly in college
I tried to hold on too tight to feel a sense of control. Eventually she felt suffocated and broke up with me.
It was a self-fulfilling prophecy really—I lost her because I was afraid I would.
Now comes the good bit, we can all change, we all have the CHOICE.
The break-up hasn’t been easy, but I’ve managed better than I could have ever imagined.
I started writing in a journal every day to get through it and understand myself better
I started making a list of things I would learn from the break-up.
“I can choose what affects me.”
By the time I finished the list those words lingered. I repeated them over and over out loud. Every time I said them I felt more powerful. I felt more control over my life. I repeated different variations of the theme:
I can choose what affects me.
I can choose to not be damaged.
I can choose to not be afraid.
I can choose to not let this break-up depress me.
I can choose to look at mistakes as learning experiences.
I can choose to be confident.
I can choose to be happy.
I can choose to feel loved.
I can choose.
Every time I said a phrase I felt a chill in my body. Tears started flowing, but I wasn’t really crying. It felt like they were escaping; like I was letting go of this deep sadness I’ve carried for so long.
It was an awakening: a healing. It was one of the most significant and amazing experiences in my life.
I wrote the words “I can choose” on my hand as a reminder. They give me the power to take control of my life. Every morning I write them again. Eventually I won’t need a visual reminder.
Whenever I feel my thoughts become negative I look at my hand and remember that it doesn’t have to be that way. We don’t have to be slaves to our pasts. We don’t have to go through life with emotional scars.
We don’t have to let negative experiences define us.
We all have power over our lives. It may be difficult to see, but it’s always there. We always have a choice.
I thought I was okay with it, but I was damaged.
I realized somewhere in my late 20s that it affected me. I felt an intense emptiness inside. I’d become sad at times for no reason. I’d feel like crying but couldn’t.
I tended to lean towards the negative. The future always seemed uncertain and scary.
It influenced relationships in ways I didn’t realize until recently.
It impacted my ability to express emotions because I’d decided that being strong meant holding them in. I wouldn’t have been able to write this a year ago.
I managed to make it to the age of 29 without having my heart broken; in fact, I was only 5 months away from 30 when it happened. It was a traumatic experience for me, probably because it was the first time.
The abandonment aspect was hardest part. I was depressed. I felt certain that something was wrong with me. I blamed myself. I hated myself. My confidence and trust were shaken. I felt abandoned. I thought I would never recover. I felt damaged yet again.
Some time later I reconnected with someone I dated briefly in college
I tried to hold on too tight to feel a sense of control. Eventually she felt suffocated and broke up with me.
It was a self-fulfilling prophecy really—I lost her because I was afraid I would.
Now comes the good bit, we can all change, we all have the CHOICE.
The break-up hasn’t been easy, but I’ve managed better than I could have ever imagined.
I started writing in a journal every day to get through it and understand myself better
I started making a list of things I would learn from the break-up.
“I can choose what affects me.”
By the time I finished the list those words lingered. I repeated them over and over out loud. Every time I said them I felt more powerful. I felt more control over my life. I repeated different variations of the theme:
I can choose what affects me.
I can choose to not be damaged.
I can choose to not be afraid.
I can choose to not let this break-up depress me.
I can choose to look at mistakes as learning experiences.
I can choose to be confident.
I can choose to be happy.
I can choose to feel loved.
I can choose.
Every time I said a phrase I felt a chill in my body. Tears started flowing, but I wasn’t really crying. It felt like they were escaping; like I was letting go of this deep sadness I’ve carried for so long.
It was an awakening: a healing. It was one of the most significant and amazing experiences in my life.
I wrote the words “I can choose” on my hand as a reminder. They give me the power to take control of my life. Every morning I write them again. Eventually I won’t need a visual reminder.
Whenever I feel my thoughts become negative I look at my hand and remember that it doesn’t have to be that way. We don’t have to be slaves to our pasts. We don’t have to go through life with emotional scars.
We don’t have to let negative experiences define us.
We all have power over our lives. It may be difficult to see, but it’s always there. We always have a choice.
Saturday, 5 February 2011
Live Life!
As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn't supposed to ever let us down, probably will. You'll have your heart broken and you'll break others' hearts. You'll fight with your best friend or maybe even fall in love with them, and you'll cry because time is flying by.
So take too many pictures, laugh too much, forgive freely, and love like you've never been hurt.
Life comes with no guarantees, no time outs, no second chances. you just have to live life to the fullest, tell someone what they mean to you and tell someone off, speak out, dance in the pouring rain, hold someones hand, comfort a friend, fall asleep watching the sun come up, stay up late, be a flirt, and smile until your face hurts.
Don't be afraid to take chances or fall in love and most of all, live in the moment because every second you spend angry or upset is a second of happiness you can never get back. ~anon~
So take too many pictures, laugh too much, forgive freely, and love like you've never been hurt.
Life comes with no guarantees, no time outs, no second chances. you just have to live life to the fullest, tell someone what they mean to you and tell someone off, speak out, dance in the pouring rain, hold someones hand, comfort a friend, fall asleep watching the sun come up, stay up late, be a flirt, and smile until your face hurts.
Don't be afraid to take chances or fall in love and most of all, live in the moment because every second you spend angry or upset is a second of happiness you can never get back. ~anon~
Day Two
Day one of my new vegetarian life consisted of mushroom lasagna, very nice, but I have to admit it was a ready meal, but ..
hold onto your hats, just look at this lean, mean vegetarian machine
It consisted of a jacket potato, mushrooms, leeks, courgettes, peppers, tomatoes and onions, all topped off with grated organic cheese, with a little pesto on the side. I think I slightly spoilt the healthy value of it by putting a 'leeeetle' too much butter on the potato, but boy was it tasty. The only thing I didn't really like was the pesto.
The rest of it was delicious. I found out my wok is missing, so a new one is needed, but all in all a good start. Everything was organic, and most of what I've bought for my weekly shop is organic and/or free range.
I actually feel much better knowing no animals died or were horribly treated in the making of my dinner.
hold onto your hats, just look at this lean, mean vegetarian machine
It consisted of a jacket potato, mushrooms, leeks, courgettes, peppers, tomatoes and onions, all topped off with grated organic cheese, with a little pesto on the side. I think I slightly spoilt the healthy value of it by putting a 'leeeetle' too much butter on the potato, but boy was it tasty. The only thing I didn't really like was the pesto.
The rest of it was delicious. I found out my wok is missing, so a new one is needed, but all in all a good start. Everything was organic, and most of what I've bought for my weekly shop is organic and/or free range.
I actually feel much better knowing no animals died or were horribly treated in the making of my dinner.
Friday, 4 February 2011
Going Forward from Regret or Guilt
“Stay away from what might have been and look at what will be.” -Marsha Petrie Sue
It's hard sometimes to move on away from regret and guilt, but what else can we do? We either sit and wallow in what might have been, or try and learn from our experiences and mistakes, and move forward. In my opinion it's easier to move forward if you've not hurt anyone else with your mistakes, especially if those are close and loved ones.
I've not learnt how to do that yet, but for others who have made mistakes that have only effected themselves then this piece from Tiny Buddha might show a way forward.
The extract from it below is a little bit like Scientology teachings, they more or less say get everyone out of your life who has or is causing you any problems. I guess this is a little less extreme, you can distance yourself, but still remain on speaking terms but on 'your' terms, and not theirs.
Think of this as your It’s a Wonderful Life moment.
You’re down on your luck and vulnerable. You have to do some major life restructuring to rebound from whatever you just experienced. Are your friends there for you, offering forgiveness and support—even if it takes them a little time to get there? If not, this may be a perfect time to remove unhealthy relationships from your life.
From Tiny Buddha.
It's hard sometimes to move on away from regret and guilt, but what else can we do? We either sit and wallow in what might have been, or try and learn from our experiences and mistakes, and move forward. In my opinion it's easier to move forward if you've not hurt anyone else with your mistakes, especially if those are close and loved ones.
I've not learnt how to do that yet, but for others who have made mistakes that have only effected themselves then this piece from Tiny Buddha might show a way forward.
The extract from it below is a little bit like Scientology teachings, they more or less say get everyone out of your life who has or is causing you any problems. I guess this is a little less extreme, you can distance yourself, but still remain on speaking terms but on 'your' terms, and not theirs.
Think of this as your It’s a Wonderful Life moment.
You’re down on your luck and vulnerable. You have to do some major life restructuring to rebound from whatever you just experienced. Are your friends there for you, offering forgiveness and support—even if it takes them a little time to get there? If not, this may be a perfect time to remove unhealthy relationships from your life.
From Tiny Buddha.
Wednesday, 2 February 2011
Veggie and Animal Cruelty
A must read if you're considering becoming vegetarian or vegan, or if you just want more information on human health and animal welfare. Eating our way to death, literally!
It's not new information or something I didn't already know but I like the way all the information is in one place and how well informed and well written the article is.
I guess this is my next goal, to go completely veggie. One step at a time. A slow change of lifestyle, rather than an instant fad switch of diet, which never works, is the way to go.
It's not new information or something I didn't already know but I like the way all the information is in one place and how well informed and well written the article is.
I guess this is my next goal, to go completely veggie. One step at a time. A slow change of lifestyle, rather than an instant fad switch of diet, which never works, is the way to go.
You're the only one you can fix!
Relationships are easy, zenhabits.
I understand that making time for someone else or giving up some of the things you love or getting your own way create some struggles in life – but once again, relationships are easy.
Perhaps what people who believe relationships are hard work are actually referring to the difficulty of interacting and living with an immature, childish human.
Why would it be hard work to be in relationship with a mature, caring grown up?
First and foremost, marriage is designed to help you grow up. It’s not about happiness. It’s not about becoming more complete, despite what Hollywood and popular press would like you to believe. Marriage is about growing. Happiness will accompany you at times along the way, but it’s not the ultimate goal.
And second: your growth – your responsibility; your spouse’s – theirs. When you keep this in mind you realize that all you can control in a relationship is yourself.
I understand that making time for someone else or giving up some of the things you love or getting your own way create some struggles in life – but once again, relationships are easy.
Perhaps what people who believe relationships are hard work are actually referring to the difficulty of interacting and living with an immature, childish human.
Why would it be hard work to be in relationship with a mature, caring grown up?
First and foremost, marriage is designed to help you grow up. It’s not about happiness. It’s not about becoming more complete, despite what Hollywood and popular press would like you to believe. Marriage is about growing. Happiness will accompany you at times along the way, but it’s not the ultimate goal.
And second: your growth – your responsibility; your spouse’s – theirs. When you keep this in mind you realize that all you can control in a relationship is yourself.
Couple of funny quotes
We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.
--Unknown
Civilized men are more discourteous than savages because they know they can be impolite without having their skulls split, as a general thing.
"The Tower of the Elephant" (1933)
Robert E. Howard
--Unknown
Civilized men are more discourteous than savages because they know they can be impolite without having their skulls split, as a general thing.
"The Tower of the Elephant" (1933)
Robert E. Howard
Wednesday, 26 January 2011
Awesome
You don't need permission to be awesome, YOU ALREADY ARE!
Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice, heart and intuition.
Don't be trapped by dogma, which is living with the results of other people's thinking.
In fact, it'd be great if we could each skip needing outside permission to be awesome by not waiting until the universe starts tapping its watch.
Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice, heart and intuition.
Don't be trapped by dogma, which is living with the results of other people's thinking.
In fact, it'd be great if we could each skip needing outside permission to be awesome by not waiting until the universe starts tapping its watch.
Tuesday, 25 January 2011
Having a happy productive family
I've posted tips here for my youngest daughter, now here is one for my eldest. She works hard bringing up her babies, now 'big girl's, as she was told by her own eldest daughter, soon to be five, bless her.
My daughter does so much for them, she's a great mum, but she should have some help from her kids, so here is a good list from zenhabits to make running the household a bit easier and getting the kids to help.
Get well soon Kate, that damn flu bug is horrible. xxx
My daughter does so much for them, she's a great mum, but she should have some help from her kids, so here is a good list from zenhabits to make running the household a bit easier and getting the kids to help.
Get well soon Kate, that damn flu bug is horrible. xxx
Mind Apples
I've just come across a new blog, called Mind Apples. It's like the 5 a day fruit campaign for physical well being but targets the mind instead.
There's a little survey you can take part in, and share the ways you keep your mind healthy with the others on the site.
The Mental Health Foundation, linked from Mind Apples, has a similar idea but using 10 healthy things you can do on a regular basis to get that happy brain feeling.
Lacking in imagination, my first 5 things were:
* Read
* Try to think positively
* Have counselling
* Study
* Try to meditate
Note the word 'try' there, as opposed to actually 'doing'. Typical of me. Anyway, after reading the other mind apples I came up with some more appealing ideas:
Have lots of contact with family
Look at the sky
Laugh
Think about how wonderful nature is
Read lots and lots and lots
Have to have reading in both lists, it's what I do a lot.
A few more ideas from Mind:
walks in the open air
supporting your football team (when they win)
being listened to and respected
being taken seriously
talking to friends
doing something you’re good at
chocolate
Basically anything you're good, at or enjoy, you should do regularly. Of course we can't all rely on others reactions to us, for instance, being listened to and respected, but my own opinion on that is to ignore those people and move on to others who will respect us and listen to us. We are too valuable and important to waste our time with people who make us feel bad.
So come on and wipe out the negatives, replace all that with positive glowing healthy 'mind apples'.
Take the survey and share your mind apples!
There's a little survey you can take part in, and share the ways you keep your mind healthy with the others on the site.
The Mental Health Foundation, linked from Mind Apples, has a similar idea but using 10 healthy things you can do on a regular basis to get that happy brain feeling.
Lacking in imagination, my first 5 things were:
* Read
* Try to think positively
* Have counselling
* Study
* Try to meditate
Note the word 'try' there, as opposed to actually 'doing'. Typical of me. Anyway, after reading the other mind apples I came up with some more appealing ideas:
Have lots of contact with family
Look at the sky
Laugh
Think about how wonderful nature is
Read lots and lots and lots
Have to have reading in both lists, it's what I do a lot.
A few more ideas from Mind:
walks in the open air
supporting your football team (when they win)
being listened to and respected
being taken seriously
talking to friends
doing something you’re good at
chocolate
Basically anything you're good, at or enjoy, you should do regularly. Of course we can't all rely on others reactions to us, for instance, being listened to and respected, but my own opinion on that is to ignore those people and move on to others who will respect us and listen to us. We are too valuable and important to waste our time with people who make us feel bad.
So come on and wipe out the negatives, replace all that with positive glowing healthy 'mind apples'.
Take the survey and share your mind apples!
Saturday, 22 January 2011
Wednesday, 19 January 2011
Inspiration
zenhabits on inspiration
Inspiration is just about everywhere you can look, if you’re looking for it. That’s the key: to keep your eyes open. Too often we miss beautiful sources of inspiration, because we’re too busy thinking about other things.
Be observant. See everything around you as a possible source of inspiration.
Some possible sources of inspiration:
blogs
books
magazines
films
people around you
nature
children
art
music
history
exercise
religion
great projects
dreams
social media
photographs
forums
google
success stories
life, everywhere
Just keep your eyes open, at all times, staying present whenever possible, and allow yourself to breathe in that inspiration.
Now Take Action
Don’t just feel inspired. Take this inspiration and use it, be moved, and do something. Channel that inspiration into creating something amazing.
Put that something out into the world, and in turn, you will inspire others.
Inspiration is just about everywhere you can look, if you’re looking for it. That’s the key: to keep your eyes open. Too often we miss beautiful sources of inspiration, because we’re too busy thinking about other things.
Be observant. See everything around you as a possible source of inspiration.
Some possible sources of inspiration:
blogs
books
magazines
films
people around you
nature
children
art
music
history
exercise
religion
great projects
dreams
social media
photographs
forums
success stories
life, everywhere
Just keep your eyes open, at all times, staying present whenever possible, and allow yourself to breathe in that inspiration.
Now Take Action
Don’t just feel inspired. Take this inspiration and use it, be moved, and do something. Channel that inspiration into creating something amazing.
Put that something out into the world, and in turn, you will inspire others.
Self Doubt - The Way Out
I love reading Leo Babauta over on zenhabits as you might have guessed!
Everyone has these doubts.
You do.
Some of you have beaten them to the point where you’re doing what you love. Others haven’t, and might not even realize those doubts are holding you back.
They are — and you can beat them. I’ve done it, my sisters have, thousands and thousands of others have too. We’re no better than you — we’ve just stumbled on better information.
Get the data. Do something, get feedback, keep doing it, get better at it, get feedback all along the way, and see what the data says. Put your doubts to test, let them be disproven. And when the results finally come in, and you know what reality really looks like, be proud of yourself for at least putting the doubts to test. I’m already proud of you, just for reading this far, and letting some small light shine on the doubts quivering in the darkness.
It’s me who is my enemy
Me who beats me up
Me who makes the monsters
Me who strips my confidence.
~Paula Cole
Everyone has these doubts.
You do.
Some of you have beaten them to the point where you’re doing what you love. Others haven’t, and might not even realize those doubts are holding you back.
They are — and you can beat them. I’ve done it, my sisters have, thousands and thousands of others have too. We’re no better than you — we’ve just stumbled on better information.
Get the data. Do something, get feedback, keep doing it, get better at it, get feedback all along the way, and see what the data says. Put your doubts to test, let them be disproven. And when the results finally come in, and you know what reality really looks like, be proud of yourself for at least putting the doubts to test. I’m already proud of you, just for reading this far, and letting some small light shine on the doubts quivering in the darkness.
It’s me who is my enemy
Me who beats me up
Me who makes the monsters
Me who strips my confidence.
~Paula Cole
Good advice for myself!
Relinquish Control from zenhabits
The Master sees things as they are,
without trying to control them.
She lets them go their own way,
and resides at the center of the circle.
This is another difficult change: to let go of our need for control. We try to control our environment, control our behaviors, control our minds, control other people, control outcomes. And yet, it’s all an illusion: we have no control over what happens. Things go wrong all the time, plans fail, we fail, and we feel like failures because of it. Because we thought we could control something, and it didn’t happen.
Controlling other people is a huge source of conflict. Stop trying to control employees, co-workers, bosses, team members, loved ones. Let them do what they want, and work with you how they will.
So how do you work without control? It takes time to learn this, but the idea is to let things happen, and act (or not act) within the flow of those events. Let people do as they please, and find calm amid this swirl of activity and people.
The Master allows things to happen.
She shapes events as they come.
She steps out of the way
and lets the Tao speak for itself.
The Master sees things as they are,
without trying to control them.
She lets them go their own way,
and resides at the center of the circle.
This is another difficult change: to let go of our need for control. We try to control our environment, control our behaviors, control our minds, control other people, control outcomes. And yet, it’s all an illusion: we have no control over what happens. Things go wrong all the time, plans fail, we fail, and we feel like failures because of it. Because we thought we could control something, and it didn’t happen.
Controlling other people is a huge source of conflict. Stop trying to control employees, co-workers, bosses, team members, loved ones. Let them do what they want, and work with you how they will.
So how do you work without control? It takes time to learn this, but the idea is to let things happen, and act (or not act) within the flow of those events. Let people do as they please, and find calm amid this swirl of activity and people.
The Master allows things to happen.
She shapes events as they come.
She steps out of the way
and lets the Tao speak for itself.
Sunday, 16 January 2011
Very hard!!
From zenhabits how to be a positive person
Condensed guide to changing your life!
Realize it’s possible, instead of telling yourself why you can’t.
Become aware of your self-talk.
Squash negative thoughts like a bug.
Replace them with positive thoughts.
Love what you have already.
Be grateful for your life, your gifts, and other people
.
Focus on what you have, not on what you haven’t.
Don’t compare yourself to others.
But be inspired by them.
Accept criticism with grace.
But ignore the naysayers.
See bad things as a blessing in disguise.
See failure as a stepping stone to success.
Surround yourself by those who are positive.
Complain less, smile more.
Image that you’re already positive.
Then become that person in your next act.
Focus on this habit first, and you’ll have a much easier time with any other.
‘A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.’ ~Herm Albright
That might make it worth while!!
Condensed guide to changing your life!
Realize it’s possible, instead of telling yourself why you can’t.
Become aware of your self-talk.
Squash negative thoughts like a bug.
Replace them with positive thoughts.
Love what you have already.
Be grateful for your life, your gifts, and other people
.
Focus on what you have, not on what you haven’t.
Don’t compare yourself to others.
But be inspired by them.
Accept criticism with grace.
But ignore the naysayers.
See bad things as a blessing in disguise.
See failure as a stepping stone to success.
Surround yourself by those who are positive.
Complain less, smile more.
Image that you’re already positive.
Then become that person in your next act.
Focus on this habit first, and you’ll have a much easier time with any other.
‘A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.’ ~Herm Albright
That might make it worth while!!
More No Goals
Living in the now from zenhabits
You don’t need goals to tell you what to do. You’re excited about doing it already — you just need to focus, and get to it.
Goals keep you focused on something in the future, instead of being present and enjoying what you’re doing right now. Goals keep you fixed on one path, which might not be the best path in a week or a month or a year. They keep you fixated on one thing, rather than being open to new opportunities, being flexible as the landscape changes, being free to pursue something you’re newly passionate about rather than sticking to something you’re tired of.
Being liberated from goals means you will always be excited about what you’re doing. And yes, you’ll accomplish things.
You’ll get somewhere great — you just might not have known you’d ever end up there when you started.
Get excited, and do stuff.
You don’t need goals to tell you what to do. You’re excited about doing it already — you just need to focus, and get to it.
Goals keep you focused on something in the future, instead of being present and enjoying what you’re doing right now. Goals keep you fixed on one path, which might not be the best path in a week or a month or a year. They keep you fixated on one thing, rather than being open to new opportunities, being flexible as the landscape changes, being free to pursue something you’re newly passionate about rather than sticking to something you’re tired of.
Being liberated from goals means you will always be excited about what you’re doing. And yes, you’ll accomplish things.
You’ll get somewhere great — you just might not have known you’d ever end up there when you started.
Get excited, and do stuff.
Mostly Solitude
Good advice on being creative by achieving a balance between solitude and participation, of course from zenhabits
I'm having a nice relaxing day reading some posts from my favourite blog writer Leo Babauta
The best art is created in solitude, for good reason: it’s only when we are alone that we can reach into ourselves and find truth, beauty, soul. Some of the most famous philosophers took daily walks, and it was on these walks that they found their deepest thoughts.
The Little But Really Useful Guide to Creativity
Here are a few from Leo's list.
Shut out the outside world.
Reflect on your life and work daily.
Look for inspiration all around you, in the smallest places.
Start small.
Just get it out, no matter how crappy that first draft.
Don’t try for perfect. Just get it out there, asap, and get feedback.
Ignore the naysayers.
But let criticism help you grow.
Apply things in other fields to your field, in ways not done before.
Write all ideas down immediately.
Get out, move, see new things, talk to new people.
Get lots of rest. Overwork kills creativity.
Don’t force it. Relax, play, it will start to flow.
Allow your mind to wander. Allow distractions, when you’re looking for inspiration.
Then shut them off when you’re going to create.
Do it when you’re excited.
When you’re not, find something else to be excited about.
Don’t be afraid to be stupid and silly.
Small ideas are good. You don’t need to change the world — just change one thing.
When something is killing your creativity, kill it.
Stop reading creativity advice, clear away everything, and just create.
Most of all, have fun doing it.
"Conversation enriches the understanding, but solitude is the school of genius."
Sir Edward Gibbon
For Gemma xxx
I'm having a nice relaxing day reading some posts from my favourite blog writer Leo Babauta
The best art is created in solitude, for good reason: it’s only when we are alone that we can reach into ourselves and find truth, beauty, soul. Some of the most famous philosophers took daily walks, and it was on these walks that they found their deepest thoughts.
The Little But Really Useful Guide to Creativity
Here are a few from Leo's list.
Shut out the outside world.
Reflect on your life and work daily.
Look for inspiration all around you, in the smallest places.
Start small.
Just get it out, no matter how crappy that first draft.
Don’t try for perfect. Just get it out there, asap, and get feedback.
Ignore the naysayers.
But let criticism help you grow.
Apply things in other fields to your field, in ways not done before.
Write all ideas down immediately.
Get out, move, see new things, talk to new people.
Get lots of rest. Overwork kills creativity.
Don’t force it. Relax, play, it will start to flow.
Allow your mind to wander. Allow distractions, when you’re looking for inspiration.
Then shut them off when you’re going to create.
Do it when you’re excited.
When you’re not, find something else to be excited about.
Don’t be afraid to be stupid and silly.
Small ideas are good. You don’t need to change the world — just change one thing.
When something is killing your creativity, kill it.
Stop reading creativity advice, clear away everything, and just create.
Most of all, have fun doing it.
"Conversation enriches the understanding, but solitude is the school of genius."
Sir Edward Gibbon
For Gemma xxx
The Zen of Doing
I just love zenhabits
Let all thoughts about anything other than the doing also fade away. They’ll come up, but gently make note of them, and then let them go. And return to the doing.
If you’re washing a dish, do it slowly, and feel every sensation. If you’re eating a fruit, taste it, feel the textures, be mindful of your hunger or lack of it. If you’re writing something, pour your heart into that writing, become the writing, inhabit the words.
Just do.
The rest of the world becomes meaningless distraction. It’s just you, and your doing.
And you realize: this is all that matters. In this, there is everything.
There is something profound in that simplicity. Something ultimately heart-rendingly breath-takingly gorgeous.
“Zen is not some kind of excitement, but concentration on our usual everyday routine.” ~Shunryu Suzuki
“When walking, walk. When eating, eat.” ~Zen proverb
“Before enlightenment; chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment; chop wood, carry water.” ~Zen proverb
Sitting quietly, doing nothing,
spring comes,
and the grass grows by itself.
~Zen proverb
Let all thoughts about anything other than the doing also fade away. They’ll come up, but gently make note of them, and then let them go. And return to the doing.
If you’re washing a dish, do it slowly, and feel every sensation. If you’re eating a fruit, taste it, feel the textures, be mindful of your hunger or lack of it. If you’re writing something, pour your heart into that writing, become the writing, inhabit the words.
Just do.
The rest of the world becomes meaningless distraction. It’s just you, and your doing.
And you realize: this is all that matters. In this, there is everything.
There is something profound in that simplicity. Something ultimately heart-rendingly breath-takingly gorgeous.
“Zen is not some kind of excitement, but concentration on our usual everyday routine.” ~Shunryu Suzuki
“When walking, walk. When eating, eat.” ~Zen proverb
“Before enlightenment; chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment; chop wood, carry water.” ~Zen proverb
Sitting quietly, doing nothing,
spring comes,
and the grass grows by itself.
~Zen proverb
No Goals!
From zenhabits
Consider this common belief: “You’ll never get anywhere unless you know where you’re going.”
This seems so common sensical, and yet it’s obviously not true if you stop to think about it.
Conduct a simple experiment: go outside and walk in a random direction, and feel free to change directions randomly. After 20 minutes, an hour … you’ll be somewhere!
It’s just that you didn’t know you were going to end up there.
And there’s the rub: you have to open your mind to going places you never expected to go. If you live without goals, you’ll explore new territory.
You’ll learn some unexpected things. You’ll end up in surprising places.
Consider this common belief: “You’ll never get anywhere unless you know where you’re going.”
This seems so common sensical, and yet it’s obviously not true if you stop to think about it.
Conduct a simple experiment: go outside and walk in a random direction, and feel free to change directions randomly. After 20 minutes, an hour … you’ll be somewhere!
It’s just that you didn’t know you were going to end up there.
And there’s the rub: you have to open your mind to going places you never expected to go. If you live without goals, you’ll explore new territory.
You’ll learn some unexpected things. You’ll end up in surprising places.
Friday, 14 January 2011
From zenhabits
I’m inspired by the Dalai Lama, who said, ” Everyday, think as you wake up, ‘today I am fortunate to have woken up, I am alive, I have a precious human life, I am not going to waste it.
I’m inspired by the Dalai Lama, who said, ” Everyday, think as you wake up, ‘today I am fortunate to have woken up, I am alive, I have a precious human life, I am not going to waste it.
Monday, 10 January 2011
Friday, 7 January 2011
Breathes deeply, opens eyes slowly, stretches ..
And looks around .. wow that was some mediation time.
Some brilliant things have been happening since we last spoke, biggest ..
My third grandchild was born, a little baby boy, the most gorgeous ever, he was born in October and has now had his first Christmas, I'm so proud of my growing family!
Isn't he just sooo beautiful?
Also my baby boo boos have started school and pre school. They are super smart and enjoying it very much, but their Mum misses them .. aww. This is my eldest granddaughter ready for school.
Beautiful, not quite 5 yet but going on a teenager already:-)
And not to be outdone her little sister started pre school. Mum was worried about leaving her but the little one said 'it's ok you can go now Mummy, bye bye, love you', and went about her playing .. bless her.
Super cute all ready for first day:-)
Awesome events I think you will agree!
Looking below me and seeing the lovely virginia creeper, I can see how long I've been in this meditative state, the creeper has long gone from my garden, as has the snow. I might post some pics of the snow later.
I see I also have a follower, how awesome, thank you and welcome to my blog Ann:-)
Christmas has also come and gone, without too much hassle. New years resolutions have also come and gone, failed already on mine, but I'm sure I read somewhere it's ok to have a blip and restart so after the 12th, yes I know I keep moving the goal posts of new years, I will restart my exercise, diet, blogging regularly, decluttering and just generally trying to improve my life. Oh yes, of course the biggy of getting out of the house. On going counselling for this.
I can't resist, I have to show you my awesome snowman, at first sign of snow, and of my family all playing in it, I had to join in and go build one myself. My hands nearly dropped off with cold, but using rubber gloves was the way to go on that one.
I don't think you will have seen anything as awesome as that in the way of a snowman!!
Some brilliant things have been happening since we last spoke, biggest ..
My third grandchild was born, a little baby boy, the most gorgeous ever, he was born in October and has now had his first Christmas, I'm so proud of my growing family!
Also my baby boo boos have started school and pre school. They are super smart and enjoying it very much, but their Mum misses them .. aww. This is my eldest granddaughter ready for school.
Beautiful, not quite 5 yet but going on a teenager already:-)
And not to be outdone her little sister started pre school. Mum was worried about leaving her but the little one said 'it's ok you can go now Mummy, bye bye, love you', and went about her playing .. bless her.
Super cute all ready for first day:-)
Awesome events I think you will agree!
Looking below me and seeing the lovely virginia creeper, I can see how long I've been in this meditative state, the creeper has long gone from my garden, as has the snow. I might post some pics of the snow later.
I see I also have a follower, how awesome, thank you and welcome to my blog Ann:-)
Christmas has also come and gone, without too much hassle. New years resolutions have also come and gone, failed already on mine, but I'm sure I read somewhere it's ok to have a blip and restart so after the 12th, yes I know I keep moving the goal posts of new years, I will restart my exercise, diet, blogging regularly, decluttering and just generally trying to improve my life. Oh yes, of course the biggy of getting out of the house. On going counselling for this.
I can't resist, I have to show you my awesome snowman, at first sign of snow, and of my family all playing in it, I had to join in and go build one myself. My hands nearly dropped off with cold, but using rubber gloves was the way to go on that one.
I don't think you will have seen anything as awesome as that in the way of a snowman!!
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